Finding Family Values in the Midst of the Holidays
before Christmas, we opened our home for a Sunday afternoon open house for our church family, from 2:00 to 4:00 p.m., friends and neighbors came and went, laughter filling the rooms as candy dishes and cookie trays slowly emptied.
Ellen, four years old, and David, three, were right in the middle of it all. They helped decorate the house, proudly showing guests from room to room, and even helped serve hot chocolate. Watching them welcome people with such enthusiasm was a quiet reminder that hospitality isn’t taught through lectures—it’s learned by example.
“Family values are often caught, not taught—absorbed in moments we don’t plan but will never forget.”
When the last guest left and the house finally grew quiet, we bundled up and drove to a neighboring town known for its Christmas decorations. Main Street was alive with color and light—Mary and Joseph at the stable, Santa and his reindeer, elves, snowmen, and a sleigh piled high with presents. Store windows glowed with model trains, toys, and dolls—every child’s dreamscape.
One store stopped us in our tracks. In its display window, two mannequins modeled elegant house robes. One was white, soft, and sparkling. The other was a warm flannel plaid—practical, cozy, and familiar, like something a farmer’s wife might wear. I hadn’t bought Helen’s gift yet, and when I glanced at her, I saw it immediately—her eyes lit up. She liked both.
Later, I asked Ellen and David what they thought. Ellen loved the flannel robe and wanted it for Mom. David liked the white one—and so did I. We couldn’t decide.
The next day, while Helen was at work, I took the kids back to the store. We bought both robes. Ellen had a hard time keeping the secret—but somehow, she did.
On Christmas Eve, we gathered together, read the Christmas story, and talked about why we celebrate Christmas in the first place. Then the children helped pass out presents—with Mom’s assistance, of course.
When Helen opened the robes, she was completely surprised. The way her face lit up was priceless. After modeling them for us, she hugged me and then pulled both children close.
And when Ellen and David were finally allowed to open their own gifts—paper flew everywhere. David received a toy truck he treasured for years. Ellen hugged a large stuffed teddy bear almost as big as she was. No one went to bed until well after midnight.
“Some of the best Christmas gifts can’t be wrapped—they’re felt.”
What This Teaches Us About Family Values
This Christmas wasn’t perfect—but it was deeply meaningful. Here’s why it worked:
- We worked together to open our home, sharing it with our church family.
- We took time to teach our children the meaning and beauty of Christmas.
- We included them in important decisions, even choosing a gift for their mom.
- We bonded through shared experiences, not just shared presents.
Christmas doesn’t have to be a traumatic season. When we intentionally choose togetherness over pressure, we create memories that outlast the decorations and gifts.
“Closeness grows when people feel seen, heard, and included—especially during stressful seasons.”
A Simple Plan to Navigate Stressful Holidays
If holidays tend to stir up tension in your family, here’s a practical plan to help keep your focus where it belongs:
- Know your family patterns.
Recognize what typically causes stress and plan ahead. Remember—time together is about people, not perfection. - Set healthy boundaries.
Be mindful of food, schedules, and commitments. Enjoy the gathering without overindulging in what brings discomfort. - Protect your joy.
Don’t let preparation and entertaining steal the heart of the celebration. - Lead with compassion.
Family time is an opportunity to extend grace, listen deeply, and strengthen understanding. - Create shared moments.
Bring games, stories, or simple activities that invite laughter and conversation across generations.
Helpful Resources for Families
If you’d like additional insight into managing family stress and strengthening relationships during the holidays, this article offers practical guidance:
👉 5 Steps to Deal with Dysfunctional Family Dynamics This Holiday Season
https://www.brainzmagazine.com/post/5-steps-to-deal-with-dysfunctional-family-dynamics-this-holiday-season
You may also find these helpful:
- Why Family Traditions Matter – https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/how_family_traditions_can_help_you_through_difficult_times
- Building Stronger Family Bonds – https://www.focusonthefamily.com/family-qa/building-strong-family-relationships/
Final Thought
“Christmas isn’t about getting everything right—it’s about getting closer to each other.”
When we choose connection over chaos, the season becomes something our families carry with them long after the lights are taken down.
Stay Connected
Christmas gives us many moments worth remembering. If this post resonated with you, you’ll find more reflections and family stories in the rest of my Christmas blogs this month, then leave a comment.
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Grace and peace to you in 2025.
In His Service,
Ron
Mountains of Elk in Paradise Valley
“A friend loveth at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.” — Proverbs 17:17
Gravel and rocks flew from my wheels. The cliff edge crumbled. Forty feet below us, the White River roared. I thought we were goners.
Colorado greeted us with everything I love—majestic peaks, ponderosa pines, trembling aspens, and air so clean it felt like a gift. But beauty that year came with danger. Drought had turned the forests into tinder, and wildfires had scorched the Flat Tops Mountains just south of our hunting grounds.
“The same land that inspires awe can humble you in an instant.”
We wondered how the fires would affect the elk—and our season. What we didn’t know yet was that adversity had already done us a favor.
A Valley Full of Promise
When Bill and I drove the scenic byway to gather firewood, we rounded a bend and stopped cold.
The valley below us moved. Thousands of elk—cows, calves, and bulls—fed peacefully in the open.
“I’d hunted for decades and never seen anything like it.”
The fires had driven them down from the mountains into the valley—less than half a mile from our camp. What looked like a disaster from a distance had quietly prepared an abundance.
That night, bugling bulls echoed across the valley, robbing us of sleep and filling us with anticipation.
Opening Day: Chaos and Blessing
Opening morning unfolded like controlled chaos. Fresh snowmelt soaked our boots. Pine scent filled the air. Then—suddenly—elk exploded from cover.
Rifles thundered. The herd scattered. When the dust settled, three animals were down. More followed throughout the day.
“It felt like every careful decision we’d made over the years finally came together in one moment.”
Packing out elk is never easy—every ridge feels steeper, every step heavier—but help appeared when we needed it most. Fellow hunters offered ATVs, muscle, and encouragement.
“Out there, most hunters still look out for one another.”
When Things Nearly Went Over the Edge
4-Star Trailers, Inc. Midland USA
Midweek, with vehicles breaking down and fatigue setting in, we rounded a sharp mountain curve and met danger head-on.
A speeding truck pulling a horse trailer slid across the centerline—straight at us.
Gravel flew. The cliff crumbled.
“L-rd, help us!” I yelled.
We missed disaster by inches.
I’m convinced angels held our tires to that road. Shaken but alive, we reported the driver. Later that season, and every year after, that same truck slowed down when he passed us.
“Sometimes accountability is an act of love for people you’ll never meet.”
Unity That Sustained Us
By week’s end, despite breakdowns, exhaustion, and tension, we had filled nearly every tag.
Ten elk. Two deer. And no one was left behind.
“Success didn’t come from luck—it came from unity.”
We worked together. We prayed together. We helped one another when vehicles failed and tempers flared. Even disagreements couldn’t fracture what teamwork had built.
Christmas from the Harvest
A month later, at Christmas, I set the table with our best China and silverware. In the center sat elk tenderloin and backstrap from that hunt.
“God blessed us with a harvest—and I wanted to celebrate His birth with what He had provided.”
As grace was said, tears flowed. Gratitude filled the room.
This wasn’t just a hunt we’d remember. It was a lesson we’d carry.
Life Lessons from Paradise Valley
• Enthusiasm matters.
“Expectation fuels perseverance.”
• Adversity often prepares abundance.
“What looks like loss may be making room for provision.”
• Gratitude multiplies success.
“A thankful heart sees clearly—even in hardship.”
• Unity turns obstacles into victories.
“We didn’t succeed alone—and we were never meant to.”
• Accountability protects others.
“Doing the right thing may save a life you’ll never know.”
Bringing It All Together
At first glance, Christmas gatherings and a high-country elk hunt might seem worlds apart. One unfolds around kitchen tables and living rooms, the other among rugged peaks and thin mountain air. Yet both stories point to the same truth:
We are shaped not just by where we go—but by who walks beside us when the journey grows difficult.
In When Christmas Brings Us Together, we’re reminded that family moments—messy, imperfect, and often unexpected—carry a quiet power. Traditions don’t have to be elaborate to be meaningful. Sometimes it’s the simple act of showing up, slowing down, and choosing one another that binds hearts together.
Mountains of Elk in Paradise Valley tells a similar story, just written in boot tracks and rifle slings instead of wrapping paper and hot chocolate. In the mountains, trust matters. Dependence on others isn’t optional—it’s survival. And often, it’s adversity that reveals the depth of friendship more clearly than comfort ever could.
Whether in a warm house at Christmas or on a cold mountainside, connection is forged when we face life together.
A Gentle Takeaway for the Season
As this Christmas season comes to a close, perhaps the invitation is simple:
1. Foster a Positive Atmosphere
- Encourage open communication and express appreciation among family members.
- Be tolerant and flexible, understanding that everyone has different perspectives and traditions. Ten Ways to Have A Happy Family Holiday. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/strategies-living/202211/10-ways-have-happy-family-holiday
2. Establish Traditions
- Create unique family traditions that everyone can look forward to each year. This could be anything from a special meal to a fun activity. 15 Wholesome Family Traditions To Start For The Holidays https://www.evite.com/blog/inspiration-ideas/holiday-traditions-for-kids-and-families/
3. Plan Activities Together
- Involve everyone in planning holiday activities, ensuring that all family members feel included and valued.
- Consider games, movie nights, or outdoor activities that cater to all ages. 100+ holiday greetings and messages for the 2025 season https://search.yahoo.com/search?ei=UTF-8&fr=crmas_sfp&p=how+to+have+joyious+family+holiday
4. Share Heartfelt Greetings
Send personalized holiday messages to express love and gratitude, enhancing the emotional connection. 70+ Heartfelt Holiday Greetings that Will Melt Hearts
https://www.nextstepliving.com/sayings/greetings/holiday-greetings
Because long after the decorations are packed away and the trails fade under new snow, what remains are the people who stood with us—through celebration, uncertainty, and everything in between.
Stay Connected
If these stories resonated with you, I invite you to explore more reflections, stories, and updates here:
You’ll find past Christmas reflections, hunting stories, and lessons drawn from faith, family, and the outdoors—all written with the same heart behind this month’s newsletter.
📬 Subscribe to my newsletter, “Whispers on the Wind”
👉 ronmcelfreshwriter.com
Each edition includes:
- Stories of recovery and resilience
- Jeep and wilderness tales
- Real talk on hard topics like teen rebellion, family estrangement, and more.
- When you subscribe to my newsletter, I will send you “The Parent’s Guide to the Occult.” Sign up at the bottom of this page.
📘 Facebook: Ron McElfresh
🐦 Twitter/X: @RMack12
🙏 If this blog encouraged you, follow me and share it with someone who needs it.
Grace and peace to you in 2025.
Thank you for taking the time to read, reflect, and walk a few miles of these journeys with me. May your season be filled with peace, meaningful connections, and memories worth carrying forward.
In His Service,
Ron